What I’ve learnt from being married for one year

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I never believed in the fairytale wedding scenario. I remember being just a child and thinking to myself – how do you know when someone’s meant to be with you forever? Now I know the answer: you just know. I simply knew I was meant to spend the rest of my life with Dan. It just felt right and exciting. So here’s what I’ve learnt from my very short married experience.

Weddings are fun

I am so glad we got to have two weddings – we just had the best fun in the world. So here’s my advice to you: if you are definitely against having a wedding, just do a small party with your loved ones. Make sure you celebrate your relationship somehow. It’s just so full of joy and happiness and goosebumps. It’s a perfect occasion for a party, just think about it: celebrating two people that are in love, celebrating getting a new family – it’s exciting for everyone!

You feel more settled

This is society messing with my head but I swear since I got married I feel more settled. It’s weird, I didn’t need a paper to know that Dan will be beside me forever. But somehow it just made it all sound more reassuring. I know it’s silly, but I’m here to be honest.

Butterflies come again

I am so much more in love since we got married, it’s crazy! It’s all the excitement I guess. Maybe also postponing our honeymoon for a year was a good thing too. It kept the momentum going if that makes sense. It’s the small things too, calling your partner “husband” or hearing him call you “wife”. Yes, it’s as cheesy at is sounds, but it feels so gooood.

It motivates you

I often hear jokes like, you got married that’s it, you can now get lazy and fat and so on. Like life ends when you get married. Since last year I have become more preoccupied with how I look and what I do career wise. I really want to make my husband proud. It’s kind of like I just realised it’s forever so I want to make sure he’ll always be interested in me, in how I look, in what I do and what I say. (and gosh I do talk a lot, so might as well be interesting!) It’s like extra motivation to get to the next level.

Baby topics are very common

If I could have a penny for every time we get asked when we’re going to have babies.. It’s fine though, it doesn’t bother me – sometimes it’s just a question to break the ice. Lately I’ve been seeing a lot of people get offended by this question and say it’s a personal matter. I agree, it is a personal matter, but I also think it’s just a courtesy question that doesn’t need to be taken seriously. People are asking for the sake of conversation, not to know the ins and outs of your reproductive thoughts.

Nothing has to change if you don’t want to

I refused to change my surname and many people got mental about it. I don’t even know why, it’s none of their business. So let me tell you why I decided to keep my name: because it’s so much more practical! I’m sorry, but I really don’t want to take days off to go all the way to the embassy to London to change all my paperwork. Then go back to Romania to change all my bank account details too. Oh and don’t forget about the drivings licence and all the bank accounts in the UK. Oh an also I like my name and I don’t want to. The thing is, marriage can be however you want it to be. You don’t have to follow all the silly social rules. It’s what matters to you and your partner. Besides my name, most of my life stayed the same. Just a bit more exciting.

What are your thoughts on marriage? let me know 🙂 

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